Got Anger?

What I appreciate the most about you folks is calling me out on my nonsense after you read my posts.

Yes, I have been more hostile than usual lately. I would like to apologize for the negativity.

I have been tested non-stop these past couple of months, and I finally snapped.

First because of drama with my sister who was like one of my best friends. Then with my mother getting in the middle with her two cents. When you cannot force your daughters to make up with each other. Especially, when one is a hot head and knows she did nothing wrong.

And yes, that would be moi!

These men aren't helping my situation either. Too aggressive. Too calculating. Too shady. Too needy for attention. Too everything. They harass you about not returning their calls...yada yada! When you speak honestly, and tell them you don't return calls because you're not interested. They say things like, 'Well, I knew we weren't a match...you are just like the weather.' I get annoyed, and think okay. Then go the fuck away! Stop sending texts trying to make me feel guilty for not hanging out with you, if you feel the way you do. I don't bother you, you bother me! I am tired of being provoked by these dudes who need too much attention.

*When I am ready to date seriously again. I'm going for the starving artist or writer type. Someone who has a lot to say, and can express themselves. Make me laugh. Write me poems...use big words I don't  understand to explain how they feel about me. The broker, the better! I want him to be so poor that it humbles him. He'll never worry about women trying to use him for his money, because he won't have any. Being poor will make him realize that he can't rely on his profession to validate him. Instead he has to rely on his personality (which is hard to do) combined with ambition to get him far in life. And no, I don't mind being a Sugar Mama...I already know that's what some of you are thinking. I am a Princess, but nothing feels better than caring for the people who mean the most to you. Especially, when they would do the same for you in a heartbeat.

I was pissy about being overshadowed on my birthday too. By one of the world's most self-centered human beings who was never a good friend to begin with...complained about not being picked up on my birthday to go out...and then let me know Monday morning what a bad friend that I am. This all comes from a person who has very few friends, drops off the face of the earth every time they are in a relationship...who calls up up out of the blues to talk about their problems, and never once asks how am I doing...never took the time to meet my friends, when I met theirs plenty of times because they were DYING for me to meet them...and who only seemed interested in me, when I had something exciting going on in my life....something that could be beneficial to them.

To top it all off, I am extremely nervous about leaving the country....making sure all my papers are in order...I receive all important documents before I move there...I learn the currency exchange to a t....I learn as many 'key' Korean words as possible...searching on the Web for apartments...getting letters of recommendations...making sure I bring bulk up on items I can't buy there...packing and labeling boxes to be sent there...and making sure my mother understands which ones to send and when to send them...all of it just makes my head hurt! I cannot forget any of this stuff either...because there ain't shit I can do about it. When I'm all the way over there.

So.

This is my excuse for being hostile.

I really am ready for a change in scenery, pace, and people. It will be exactly what I need!

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry